i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize