I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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