You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Randomize