Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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