it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
