He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I just want nice things and good sex
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Randomize
