I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
