Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
