hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
