so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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