he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
