Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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