Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
