i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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