You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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