i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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