I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
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