I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
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