If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
