yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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