what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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