You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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