I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
