Walk of Shame. In a state park.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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