My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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