One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
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