I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize