You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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