Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
i already hear my dad disowning me
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then he tried to convert me to islam
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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