He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
They have beer where we have blood.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
