I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
