Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
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He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
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I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize