You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
