We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
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