There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
