bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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