Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
