oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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