that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hippo gnu deer
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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