i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
