trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
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You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
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I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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