sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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