I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
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