i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i came on her dog
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize