I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
