After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
