i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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