Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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