She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
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P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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