last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
