ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize